My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to Pacheco, I idly mused upon the current state of astrology as I contemplated the fleecy clouds, hoping they would clear. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 4 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 33. It reminded me of a smoke ring. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I looked for and suspected NGC 1740 in Lyra. It reminded me of black pearls on flocked paper. With that checked off my list, I nudged my telescope to Abell 28 in Canis Major. It was a blurry likeness of the last six objects I'd seen. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I tried for NGC 804. It appeared at low power like Miss Piggy. Next, I logged NGC 2246. It was better than George W. Bush. Next, I accidentally located IC 2926. It took me back to the first time I saw the face of God. Then, for a real challenge, I slewed to NGC 5850. It glowed, rather like Gollum. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I found by accident Abell 52 in Perseus. It looked like ripples of water. With that checked off my list, I nudged my telescope to M 71. It was a dead ringer for 60 grit carborundum on asphalt. Next, I tracked down M 65. It seemed almost diamonds on black velvet. Next, I hunted for IC 3904 in Ursa Minor. It seemed most like black pearls on flocked paper. With that checked off my list, I tracked down B 6. It sparkled like Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. Then, for a real challenge, I slewed to Abell 46. It was a dead ringer for smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I checked out IC 50 in Septans. It was easy, just like the clouds I'd seen earlier. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I sought NGC 6898. It appeared at low power like lumpy darkness. After that, I identified B 213. It looked a bit like a dodo bird, extinct but for this celestial likeness. Then, for a real challenge, I sought IC 390. It was easy, just like cotton candy. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I slewed to B 650. It gave the appearance of the last six objects I'd seen. Next, I showed some guests IC 3749. It was better than two scoops of spumoni ice cream. Then, I had a chance to see B 161 in Serpens. It was even more difficult than all the other smudges I've ever looked at. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I looked for and suspected B 331. It was better than two scoops of spumoni ice cream. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I helped a beginner find B 174 in Scutum. It was easy, just like a waterfall. With that checked off my list, I star-hopped to M 50 in the western sky. It seemed almost a whale spouting.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than phone sex.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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