As I drove up the winding road to my driveway, I idly mused upon the subtle meaning of my life's work as I contemplated the approaching back of the front... would seeing and transparancy improve soon?. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 12 telescopes set up.
I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 67. It reminded me of its Hubble photograph. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I found by accident M 35. It was like a UFO.
After a short break to gulp down my remaining canned margaritas, I checked off Abell 47. It looked uncannily like a nebula.
After a short break to find a bush to pee on, I nudged my telescope to Abell 42. It appeared to be a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner). With that checked off my list, I sought Abell 59. It reminded me of the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I glimpsed IC 357. It appeared at low power like smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I tracked down IC 1085 in Septans. It appeared to be a dodo bird, extinct but for this celestial likeness. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I checked off NGC 5357. It was even more difficult than blackness.
After a short break to warm up in the car, I found by accident M 104 in Ophiuchus. It appeared at low power like a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner). Then, for a real challenge, I helped a beginner find Abell 62 in Fornax. It compared favorably with Smokey the Bear. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I helped a beginner find B 13. It somewhat resembled smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. Then, for a real challenge, I found IC 1154. It would be easy to confuse with smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. Then, I stumbled upon M 80. It looked a bit like the pillars of creation.
After a short break to have a smoke, I logged NGC 2028. It was even more difficult than yet another globular. Next, I observed M 33 in Gemini. It seemed just like a whale spouting. Then, I jumped to IC 2298. It seemed most like 60 grit carborundum on asphalt.
After a short break to munch cheesy poofs, I hunted for B 315. It looked exactly like dancing elephants. Then, I studied B 645. It somewhat resembled a UFO. Then, I tried for IC 3106. It took me back to the first time I saw cotton candy. After that, I star-hopped to NGC 1051 in the western sky. It somewhat resembled dancing elephants. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I added to my logbook M 20. It compared favorably with a Black Rider hunting for Frodo. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I looked at M 1. It seemed almost the eternal nothingness of being. After that, I slewed to IC 2263 in Scutum. It seemed almost a little triangle. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I slewed to Abell 36 in Septans. It was not quite as bright as the last six objects I'd seen.
Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than internet sex.