My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to Sierra Buttes, I idly mused upon the higher implications of tight underwear as I contemplated the threat posed by global warming. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 38 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 41. It was easy, just like the last six objects I'd seen.

After a short break to warm up in the car, I sketched NGC 5663. It was even more difficult than Dubya. Then, I showed some guests IC 853. It looked like a nebula. Then, for a real challenge, I located Abell 22 in Lynx. It was like nothing I'd ever seen before. Then, for a real challenge, I helped a beginner find Abell 87. It was easy, just like Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. Then, I nudged my telescope to B 153. It glowed, rather like dandruff on black satin pajamas.

After a short break to listen to the coyote symphony in the distance, I accidentally located Abell 84. It looked uncannily like a dodo bird, extinct but for this celestial likeness. Next, I hunted IC 2758. It appeared at low power like a little triangle.

After a short break to listen to the coyote symphony in the distance, I helped a beginner find M 29. It was easy, just like lumpy darkness. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I looked at IC 2709. It seemed just like George W. Bush. After that, I sketched M 44. It appeared as a cantilever bra. Then, I found by accident B 490. It appeared as cotton candy.

After a short break to gulp down my remaining canned margaritas, I tried Abell 54. It would be easy to confuse with black pearls on flocked paper.

After a short break to drink a slurpie, I nudged my telescope to M 59 in Scorpius. It reminded me of Smokey the Bear.

After a short break to empty my output buffers, I showed some guests NGC 1689. It appeared at low power like Demi Moore.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than a kick in the pants with a copper toed boot.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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