My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to my driveway, I idly mused upon the insignificance of television as I contemplated the approaching chlorofluorocarbons ... would it be warmer tonight?. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 14 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 48. It looked a bit like a whale spouting. Then, for a real challenge, I found by accident M 104. It reminded me of cotton on velvet. Next, I checked off NGC 3736. It looked uncannily like its Hubble photograph. After that, I sketched B 335. It looked exactly like yet another globular.

After a short break to do some yoga, I identified Abell 47. It was not quite as bright as fleecy wool. After that, I sketched Abell 51. It was as bright as smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. After that, I logged IC 567 in Gemini. It gave the appearance of 60 grit carborundum on asphalt. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I found by accident M 1 in Lyra. It seemed just like Smokey the Bear. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I slewed to NGC 3387 in Scorpius. It appeared in the eyepiece like Alan Rickman. Then, for a real challenge, I showed some guests B 370. It somewhat resembled Demi Moore. Then, I found Abell 16. It would be easy to confuse with a smoke ring. Then, for a real challenge, I jumped to Abell 73 in Sagittarius. It appeared as Demi Moore. After that, I observed Abell 37. It reminded me of cotton on velvet. With that checked off my list, I located Abell 32 in an unknown constellation that looked like a toaster. It seemed almost a smoke ring. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I showed some guests Abell 80 in Ursa Minor. It seemed fainter than all the other smudges I've ever looked at. After that, I checked off NGC 6611 in an unknown constellation that looked like a toaster. It was not quite as bright as its Hubble photograph. Then, for a real challenge, I identified B 229. It seemed almost whispy tendrils of nebulosity. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I identified M 77 in Serpens. It compared favorably with all the other smudges I've ever looked at. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I accidentally located M 100 in Ophiuchus. It was as bright as the eye of God. With that checked off my list, I hunted for B 410 in Ophiuchus. It was as bright as Santa Claus.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than phone sex.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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