As I drove up the winding road to Devastated Area, I idly mused upon the socioeconomic impact of tight underwear as I contemplated the La Nina conditions. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 48 telescopes set up.
I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 75 in Camelopardalis. It was as bright as Santa Claus. After that, I logged NGC 5243. It appeared in the eyepiece like a faint puff of nothingness, with a suspected, but not confirmed, central star. With that checked off my list, I hunted B 297. It seemed almost cream being swirled into hot coffee. Then, I star-hopped to B 574. It seemed almost smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I studied M 98. It looked exactly like a Black Rider hunting for Frodo. With that checked off my list, I went for B 419 in Ursa Minor. It reminded me of a nebula. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I tried NGC 3696. It took me back to the first time I saw the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. Next, I glimpsed M 102 in Camelopardalis. It reminded me of George W. Bush. After that, I checked out B 521 in Serpens. It appeared as a spitting cobra. Then, I showed some guests Abell 24. It seemed just like Demi Moore. Next, I looked at Abell 21. It looked a bit like a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner). Then, for a real challenge, I accidentally located Abell 78. It gave the appearance of its Hubble photograph. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I sketched B 592. It appeared to be one of Martha Stewart's doilies. Next, I observed NGC 5334. It reminded me of a waterfall. Then, for a real challenge, I tracked down IC 37 in Canis Major. It gave the appearance of a smoke ring. Then, I star-hopped to B 169 in Ursa Major. It was a blurry likeness of a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner). Next, I tried B 206. It appeared in the eyepiece like an inflamed monkey butt.
After a short break to warm up in the car, I logged M 108. It was not quite as bright as the eye of God. Next, I helped a beginner find B 558. It appeared to be the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. Then, for a real challenge, I tried NGC 6481. It was even more difficult than lumpy darkness.
Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than getting shot in the face by Dick Cheney.