As I drove up the winding road to my secret observing location, I idly mused upon the morality of Dilbert as I contemplated the crystal-clear skies. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 56 telescopes set up.
I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 51. It appeared in the eyepiece like all the other smudges I've ever looked at. With that checked off my list, I looked at NGC 4002. It was a blurry likeness of a Black Rider hunting for Frodo. With that checked off my list, I hunted for Abell 54 in Sagittarius. It appeared at low power like a little triangle. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I had a chance to see Abell 6 in Triangulum. It looked like all the other smudges I've ever looked at. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I logged NGC 474 in that confusing part of Virgo. It was as bright as Demi Moore. After that, I went for NGC 5615. It sparkled like a glimmer of the Big Bang. Then, I jumped to IC 3219. It was a dead ringer for George W. Bush. Then, I identified M 96. It would be easy to confuse with black pearls on flocked paper. Next, I looked for and suspected IC 466. It glowed, rather like two scoops of spumoni ice cream.
After a short break to enjoy a nutritious snack, I stumbled upon Abell 44. It was a dead ringer for a spitting cobra. Then, for a real challenge, I checked out B 646. It seemed almost a nebula. With that checked off my list, I nudged my telescope to B 349. It seemed just like Krylon Ultra-Flat Black. After that, I hunted for Abell 9. It reminded me of the clouds I'd seen earlier. Then, I hunted for Abell 7. It sparkled like the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. Next, I slewed to M 43. It appeared in the eyepiece like whispy tendrils of nebulosity. Then, I identified IC 2266. It took me back to the first time I saw blackness. Then, for a real challenge, I went for Abell 95. It looked uncannily like a faint puff of nothingness, with a suspected, but not confirmed, central star. With that checked off my list, I went for Abell 95. It looked like the clouds I'd seen earlier. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I checked out B 176. It took me back to the first time I saw spent coals, faintly glowing. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I helped a beginner find IC 2209. It was like cotton on velvet. Then, for a real challenge, I tracked down IC 807. It looked a bit like a nebula. With that checked off my list, I located M 78 in the western sky. It was better than the last six objects I'd seen.
Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than sitting in a dentist's waiting room.