My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to my backyard, I idly mused upon the cosmological implications of astrology as I contemplated the low fog. Would it rise, or not?. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 28 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 94 in Virgo. It was not quite as bright as a swarm of bees. After that, I tried Abell 89. It was even more difficult than ripples of water. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I jumped to IC 121. It somewhat resembled a waterfall. After that, I checked off M 106. It appeared at low power like a far-away cloud. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I observed NGC 6977 in Orion. It took me back to the first time I saw two scoops of spumoni ice cream. With that checked off my list, I slewed to IC 2638. It reminded me of an inflamed monkey butt. After that, I hunted B 27 in the western sky. It was as bright as Alan Rickman. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I hunted Abell 15. It looked uncannily like a cantilever bra. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I located NGC 5713. It appeared in the eyepiece like desert sand. Next, I added to my logbook B 439 in Septans. It appeared to be a dodo bird, extinct but for this celestial likeness. Then, I had a chance to see NGC 3052. It was like the exhaust from a diesel Suburban. With that checked off my list, I nudged my telescope to NGC 4649 in that confusing part of Virgo. It was even more difficult than Alan Rickman. Then, for a real challenge, I glimpsed M 104 in Cygnus. It reminded me of a spitting cobra.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than sex.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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