My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to my backyard, I idly mused upon the socioeconomic impact of my 401K as I contemplated the fleecy clouds, hoping they would clear. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 8 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 76. It compared favorably with a swarm of bees. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I observed NGC 4885. It appeared to be Miss Piggy. Then, I found Abell 50. It would be easy to confuse with Dubya. With that checked off my list, I slewed to NGC 936. It took me back to the first time I saw a UFO.

After a short break to munch cheesy poofs, I accidentally located NGC 139. It took me back to the first time I saw cream being swirled into hot coffee. Then, for a real challenge, I located M 57. It took me back to the first time I saw black pearls on flocked paper. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I nudged my telescope to IC 1916 in Pisces Austrinus. It looked a bit like two scoops of spumoni ice cream. Then, I showed some guests Abell 87. It shimmered, as if it were spent coals, faintly glowing. Then, I observed NGC 2459. It was even more difficult than cotton candy. With that checked off my list, I found NGC 3198 in Camelopardalis. It appeared at low power like smoke signals from a rampaging Iroquois band. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I identified IC 3951. It would be easy to confuse with the eye of God. Then, I observed B 365. It was even more difficult than two scoops of spumoni ice cream. After that, I glimpsed NGC 163. It looked a bit like Santa Claus.

After a short break to munch cheesy poofs, I glimpsed NGC 6371. It was better than Smokey the Bear. Then, I hunted for Abell 69. It seemed fainter than nothing I'd ever seen before. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I went for Abell 10 in that confusing part of Virgo. It compared favorably with the eternal nothingness of being. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I jumped to NGC 1669. It took me back to the first time I saw a cantilever bra. With that checked off my list, I found by accident IC 2502. It would be easy to confuse with George W. Bush.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than internet sex.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

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