My observing report

As I drove up the winding road to my backyard, I idly mused upon the subtle meaning of AP Refractors as I contemplated the threat posed by global warming. When I arrived at the parking lot, it was filled with friends eager for a night's observing. I counted at least 55 telescopes set up.

I started my night's observing with one of my favorite objects, M 36 in the western sky. It appeared as a hamburger. (Hmm, it had been a while since dinner).

After a short break to walk around, I slewed to B 356. It seemed most like George W. Bush. With that checked off my list, I nudged my telescope to Abell 25. It reminded me of fleecy wool.

After a short break to find a bush to pee on, I hunted Abell 39. It gave the appearance of Gollum. Then, I tracked down B 174. It took me back to the first time I saw Alan Rickman. After that, I sought Abell 75. It looked exactly like a glimmer of the Big Bang. Then, I went for B 417 in Ursa Minor. It seemed fainter than all the other smudges I've ever looked at. With that checked off my list, I accidentally located M 40. It was a dead ringer for diamonds on black velvet. After that, I checked out M 11. It sparkled like a dodo bird, extinct but for this celestial likeness. Then, for a real challenge, I found NGC 4879. It was not quite as bright as one of Martha Stewart's doilies. Then, I observed B 312. It sparkled like a UFO. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I hunted for B 67 in Virgo. It seemed fainter than George W. Bush.

After a short break to listen to the coyote symphony in the distance, I looked at B 23 in Triangulum. It sparkled like the face of God. Then, for a real challenge, I accidentally located Abell 8. It seemed almost a whale spouting. Next, attacking my personal nemesis, I found by accident B 132. It was a dead ringer for the pillars of creation. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I studied NGC 759. It appeared in the eyepiece like diamonds on black velvet. After that, I identified M 6 in Hydra. It looked a bit like a whale spouting. After I'd spent a few minutes looking at that, I hunted for NGC 6523 in Antlia. It seemed most like yet another globular. After that, I jumped to M 93 in Fornax. It seemed almost an inflamed monkey butt. Then, I slewed to Abell 4. It was easy, just like the clouds I'd seen earlier.

After a short break to find a bush to pee on, I jumped to NGC 6838 in Ophiuchus. It looked a bit like cotton candy. Then, for a real challenge, I showed some guests IC 2657. It appeared in the eyepiece like diamonds on light grey velvet. Next, I went for Abell 86 in Gemini. It was a blurry likeness of dandruff on black satin pajamas. With that checked off my list, I hunted for NGC 1742. It was like a little triangle.

Finally, it was time to pack up and leave. As I drove home, I contemplated the events of the night, and realized that any night out under the sky with good friends is better than a poke in the eye with a frozen dishrag.


    ...Akkana (with help from David North, Jane Houston Jones, and Bill Arnett) .

(Don't forget to hit reload.)